I guess I won't be drinking pumpkin beer this Fall . . .

because I'm PREGNANT!!!

I got my beta results from the doctor yesterday!  The conversation went like this:

RE office: Hi, this is Amy from Dr. M's office, how are you?
Me: (thinking, I know who you are, get to the point) Fine.
Amy: How are you feeling?
Me: fine (okay, why stall?)
Amy: Have you been taking a lot of home pregnancy tests?
Me: No, I haven't taken any.
Amy: Well, good, cause . . . you're pregnant!!!  And I can't believe you made me wait until 3:30 to call you!
Me: OMG!

Then, I ask what the beta number is and Amy says, "Well, that's something I wanted to talk to you about.  Usually we like to see the number around 100 (so I'm thinking, great, it's a low number), but yours is at 347!  That could mean that you have an embryo with strong hormones, or, it could mean that there are two in there!"  I said that I didn't care, I was just so happy that it worked.

It was so neat to hear how happy my Dr.'s office was for me.  It seemed as if they had all been waiting on baited breath to tell me.  I know that my case was discussed often at the RE's office, because I was a "tough egg to crack".  So, I imagined that they all gathered around and congratulated their work and my success!  At least that's how I like to picture it.

So, after I got the news, I drove to Chris' work to tell him in person.  He was expecting a phone call from me, so he was quite shocked to see me show up.  He said he didn't know if I was there for good news or bad, but I finally said, "It worked!"  He didn't show much emotion, but I think he's still in shock.  He said he's trying to be cautiously optimistic, which I understand, because there are A LOT more milestones to cross before we can rest assured that this is really happening!  But, at least it WORKED!!  I've NEVER been pregnant before.  This is the farthest I've ever gotten in the fertility process.

After I met up with Chris, we drove to his parents' house, and caught them just as they were about to walk out the door.  My brother-in-law and sister-in-law were both their with their twins as well (they live with Chris' parents for now).  Chris told them the news and I think they were in a bit of disbelief at first too!  My sister-in-law started squealing and making all kinds of plans for our children to have play dates and such, which was fun.  It was so neat to hear their excitement.  They were headed out to meet Chris' grandfather at Cracker Barrel for dinner, so we decided to tag along.  It took about 4 tries to tell Chris' grandpa the news, as he had to keep turning up his hearing aid.  He asked if it was natural, and I said "no." So, he said, "oh, you're adopting then?"  And, rather than try to explain it to him we decided to go with, "no, it's natural."

My mom was coming back in town on a flight at 8:30, so we decided to go over to my parents' house to wait for them.  We parked up the street so that they wouldn't see our car, and then we let ourselves into their house to wait.  It took a while before they even noticed us sitting on the couch, but when they did, they still didn't know anything was up.  I hadn't told my mom when my beta was scheduled, so she didn't know that I knew.  I handed her a pregnancy test that I bought just before hand and said, "Happy Birthday!"  (Her birthday is today)  She said, "What is this?"  Then she threw it across the table and started squealing and stomping.  I wish I had caught it on video, but of course we were so caught up in the moment we forgot to record it.  My dad was in the background going, "What?  What?!"  They were so excited.  This will be their first grandchild/children.

So, here we go!  Hold on for the ride to baby town!  I'm keeping this baby in there no matter what.  I'm telling her/him they can't go anywhere!  They have to stick around!

Ice Ice Baby

Google Images does not have stock photos of frozen embryos -- freezer was the best I could do.

Well, I got some good news Monday!  Two of our embryos made it to freeze!  We had 1 from our previous fresh IVF cycle, so now we have 3 frozen embryos!  Probably enough to do a FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer).  But, I am hoping we don't need to do the FET until we want a 2nd child!!!!!

I am feeling much better!  I was all hunched over and not walking well last week from Wednesday until Sunday.  My ovaries were so huge, they were knocking into all of my other organs causing referred pain to my back, diaphragm, uterus, and of course the ovaries themselves were sore.  I feel some slight discomfort still in the uterus area, but at least I can walk standing up straight!

I don't have too much to report other than that!  People keep asking if I feel pregnant, but really?  I don't think that is possible.  I mean, the embryos, assuming they have become blastocysts and hatched, and are implanting as we speak, still will not be emitting enough levels of hcg for my body to react as if I'm pregnant.  So, no, I do not feel pregnant.  Although, how would I know if I did?  I have NEVER been pregnant before.  Not even a hint of pregnant.

I have been baking more lately.  I have the most delicious pumpkin bread ever waiting in my freezer.  How do I know if it's delicious if it's in the freezer?  It couldn't be because Chris and I already ate the whole loaf in a matter of days?  We ate that sucker so fast I didn't even get a picture.  So, whenever I decide to thaw the 2nd loaf (probably soon, it's calling to me), I will post about it!  Don't worry, recipe to be included!

Embabies nestle in!!

Well, here they are, the embabies!  We went in for a three day transfer yesterday.  The doctor seemed pleased with the embryos that she was getting ready to transfer.  The 7 cell had perfect clarity, and the 8 cell had only slight fragmentation.  In the ultrasound picture you can see a sliver of white which is a photo capture of the notorious "flash of light" that happens when the embryos and the oxygen around them are injected into the uterus.  That huge black blob above the embryos is my bladder that is completely full (per doctor's orders)!  I was so glad I didn't pee on the doctor.

And here they are, Baby A and Baby B!!!  PLEASE STAY WITH US FOR 9 MONTHS THIS TIME!

Your vote matters!

Well, while there was by no means resounding participation in my little poll this week, the majority voted that I bake a recipe from Martha Stewart's Cookies! So, I did!  They were quite tasty!  I would say they were very similar in both taste and texture to actual carrot cake, the difference being that with these the icing is sandwiched between the caky layers.  I was feeling ambitious, so I also whipped up a batch of this ginger ice cream that I found on Tartlette's blog!  It was very good, but you must like ginger to enjoy it!  It was kind of like a strong ginger snap in cold, silky-smooth form.

Carrot Cake Cookie with homemade ginger ice cream

          Here is the recipe if you'd like.  I substituted grated coconut for the raisins:

• FOR THE FILLING:
• 2 ounces bar cream cheese, room temperature
• 2 ounces unsalted butter, room temperature
• 1/4 cup confectioners' sugar
• 1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice
• FOR THE COOKIES:
• 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted
• 1/2 cup packed light-brown sugar
• 1/4 cup granulated sugar
• 1 large egg yolk
• 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon ground ginger
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 cup rolled oats
• 3/4 cup packed, finely grated, peeled carrots
• 1/3 cup dried currants

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Make filling: With an electric mixer, beat cream cheese and butter until smooth. Add sugar and lemon juice; beat until combined. Cover; chill until firm, at least 30 minutes.
2. Meanwhile, make cookies: In a large bowl, whisk together butter, sugars, and egg yolk. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, ginger, and salt. Add flour mixture to butter mixture; stir until combined. Mix in oats, carrots, and currants.
3. Drop dough by level tablespoons, 2 inches apart, onto prepared baking sheets. Flatten with the palm of your hand. Bake until edges are crisp, rotating baking sheets halfway through, 15 to 18 minutes. Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool.
4. Turn half the cookies over, bottom side up; dollop each with about 1 teaspoon chilled cream-cheese filling. Top with remaining cookies, pressing gently to spread filling to edges. Serve immediately.

Read more at Marthastewart.com: Carrot-Cake Cookies Recipe - MarthaStewart.com 

Retrieved

Well, Wednesday, despite the worries about my high estrogen, my doctors let me go through with egg retrieval!  They were able to retrieve 19 eggs!  I got the call about their fertilization yesterday, and 15 out of the 19 fertilized.  Tomorrow we will get a call in the morning on whether or not we should come in for the egg transfer.  If they don't have us come in tomorrow, the egg transfer will be on Monday.  I am still feeling pretty uncomfortable.  My ovaries are super enlarged (I'm guessing) and causing referred pain to my back and diaphragm areas.  Needless to say, I was walking pretty funny today making it very difficult to hide that something was up from my coworkers!

Here I am before egg retrieval surgery, and before they put in the IV.  I look much calmer than with the first egg retrieval!

Post egg retrieval, not looking as hot.  I was in more pain this time than the first IVF.

I'm hyper

Hyper stimulated, that is.  After my ultrasound and blood work this morning, the doctor called me herself.  Usually it's the nurse practitioner, so I knew something was up.  My estrogen is at 5200, which is not good.  It's way too high, and they are worried about me coming down with Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS).  My doctor said she would let me take the hcg trigger shot tonight, despite the high estrogen, but that she was worried.  She suggested that after my retrieval surgery, we freeze all embryos except for 6, in case I am not able to do a fresh transfer due to OHSS.  Last IVF they were really worried about my estrogen being so high too, but it was only at 3500 or so.  I didn't get OHSS last time, but that doesn't mean that I won't this time.  I don't feel horrible yet, just pretty full in the ovary area.  But, I guess at least I get to go through with the retrieval.  At least I didn't develop all of these eggs for nothing.  So, my retrieval surgery is scheduled for 8:00 am this Wednesday.  I get to take the lovely intramuscular hcg shot tonight.

Even thought the poll isn't technically over, it looks as though a recipe from Martha Stewart's Cookies won out!  I will be posting the outcome sometime in the next day or so!  Thanks for participating in getting my butt in gear with the baking!

Vote Now!

Hey guys, I added a polling gadget to the left!  Vote for what you would like to see me bake this weekend!  Vote now or forever hold your peace!

Recommendations anyone?

I have been compiling a list of uplifting, not going to give up, happy, motivational songs for a playlist I like to call "F@#$ Infertility" on my iTunes.  What are your most inspirational, upbeat songs that you turn to when you need your spirits lifted?

I have been listening to my playlist on the way to my RE's office before each ultrasound or blood work appointment!  I definitely feel a more positive attitude this round!!  Maybe the music is working?!

My playlist so far (it's slim, but my RE's office doesn't take long to get to from our house):

Something's Coming -- West Side Story Soundtrack
Accentuate the Positive -- Duke Ellington
Hey, Hey, Hey (It's Gonna Be Okay) -- Stephanie's Id
Free Me -- Joss Stone
Don't Stop Believing -- Glee Soundtrack version

I'd love to hear your suggestions!!